Every year for about a week, there is a so-to-speak “mad dash” to listen to all of the Christmas songs as much as humanly possible. Then reality sets in and you realize that if you hear another Christmas song, you might become Krampus yourself and drop kick someone. Now that it’s less than a week away from Christmas, you are in the heat of Christmas fever and have undoubtedly heard every Christmas song written by Mariah Carey three times over, you need an escape.
So, how do you keep yourself grounded but festive at the same time like me? Well, there is no real answer other than one Christmas song per day, if that even happens. However, one answer I always tend to find myself going back to… listening to Christmas songs that aren’t actually Christmas songs. You know what I’m talking about because your eyebrows just perked up. In fact, I’ll give you a dollar if a song immediately didn’t come to mind. Just give us a call and ask for Chris or Danny to receive your dollar. Definitely do not ask for Brian. Brian had absolutely NOTHING to do with this post. With that said, lets go through the top five Christmassy Non-Christmas songs in no particular order.
5. Die Hard Theme Song
Yippe Ki Yay, you Christmas rejects. Is there anything more relaxing and festive than watching the Nakatomi Plaza get overrun by foreigners, essentially blown up and saved by the one and only John McClane DURING CHRISTMAS? Doubt it. In fact, with that sentiment, not only is it overwhelmingly festive, it’s patriotic. That is a movie anyone should be able to get behind.
4. A Pimp’s Christmas Song – Snoop Dogg
Tired of sleigh bells, soft spoken voices and chestnuts roasting by the open fire? We all are. This song has Christmas in the title, but don’t let that fool you. The beats and lyrics that come with this track can make any elf ready to bust a move. With references to rolling trees and not decorating them, deep gangsta-esqe vocals, and an all-around ghetto vibe, this song is certain to throw your vanilla Christmas playlist for a whirl, cause this isn’t just Christmas… This is a Pimp’s Christmas.
3. Gonna Fly Now – Bill Conti
Recognize the name of the song? Well, then you are a true fan. There are two kinds of views on Christmas; it’s either seen as a marathon or a sprint. However, this view doesn’t need to effect your psyche anymore than Ivan Drago effected Rocky’s. You just have to keep focused and keep your nose to the pavement to get through it all. With all of the trumpets and upbeat tones of this Rocky theme, it’s hard to differentiate if this song is rooting you on or rooting Christmas on. Let’s go with both.
2. Welcome Home – Radical Face
Between the gusty wind and chimes at the beginning of the song, it immediately hits you with a wintery feel. Then the song actually gets into the lyrics and you’re like “woah, this isn’t a Christmas song?” With a time of the year where everyone travels home to hang out with family, it’s hard not to see a song named “Welcome Home” with a favorable Christmas light. Does it have anything to do with Christmas, though? No. Not at all.
1. The Frog Chorus – Wynn Erickson
I have absolutely no idea where this song came from, but I’ll be damned if I don’t think it reminds me of Christmas. Don’t let the name fool you, because the lack of frog croaks and influx of things like chimes and organ music make this song magical. If the Ghost of Christmas Past visits me tonight and whisks me away to some former part of my life, I want to be flying in the sky with this song in the background.
You have four more days until Christmas. You can do this. If all else fails, just attack the eggnog with a Clark Griswald fervor and have the hap-hap Happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny Kaye! Hallelujah! Where’s the Tylenol?
Written By Chris and Danny, definitely not Brian